Everyday influence
We are influenced every single day, whether we realize it or not. We allow our feelings, opinions, and moods to change, sometimes quite deliberately, and other times inadvertently, by what’s going on around us or by who happens to be around us. For example, think about this scenario for a moment. You wake up feeling absolutely rested. I know, what a thought, right? But seriously, you wake up feeling refreshed and ready to take on the world, and your morning seems to be going so well. You get into your car and hit the road to work. Traffic is flowing wonderfully, and then, out of nowhere, a car suddenly cuts you off, and you find yourself slamming on your brakes. You are startled and thrown off balance because you were enjoying your happy zone. Now most of us can brush off this kind of incident pretty quickly with a few choice words before moving on with our day, but for those of you who struggle with it, you might find yourself simmering with anger, honking your horn, and perhaps following that car, maybe even attempting to return a gesture or two at them. In that fleeting moment, you’ve allowed this stranger to influence your mood in a way you never intended. Now, some of you might be reading this and listing all the reasons that justify your feelings of anger, and perhaps those reasons are indeed justified. In those moments of frustration, I try to reflect on what might be going on with that person who just cut me off. Perhaps they’re in a tremendous hurry and truly didn’t see me; they certainly didn’t mean to cause any harm. I know I have done things to others accidentally myself. Or maybe that person really is just an entitled jerk; who knows! In any event, while I try not to let that situation affect my mood for too long, the truth is, my surroundings and the actions of others do influence me more than I’d like to admit. I’ll share a couple of examples that I hope you can relate to, as I know we all navigate these complex social waters together.
Think about your place of business and your colleagues, all unique individuals with their own quirks and personalities. I’m sure there's maybe one or two who just get under your skin every now and then. For me personally, I’ll share that working alongside negative people really brings me down and makes the workday feel longer and more burdensome. I’m talking about that colleague who constantly complains about everything, big or small. Nothing seems to make this person happy except to drown themselves in their own grievances and hear themselves complain endlessly. And unfortunately, there’s often nothing you can do to help them out of this rut because they always have a reason or excuse as to why the suggestions you offer simply won't work for them. It can be quite exhausting! Then on the flip side, I’ve also been fortunate enough to work with those wonderfully cheerful and energetic people who radiate positivity, and you can’t help but love being around them. No matter what mood you come to work in, they have this uncanny ability to brighten your day with their infectious enthusiasm.
Perhaps the person we ultimately choose to partner with in life can have a profound impact on our beliefs and values. What happens when you enter into a relationship as a devoted Christ follower while your partner does not share the same faith, or even questions the very existence of Christ himself? Who ends up being influenced by whom in such a situation? I know a gentleman who was a deeply devoted Christ follower, someone who not only adhered to the teachings of the Bible but also regularly attended church and made significant life choices based on God's plan for him. However, everything changed when one day he crossed paths with a girl, and they began a romantic relationship. Over time, to the surprise of many, he found himself drifting away from his faith and ultimately refusing to follow Christ any longer. He altered his beliefs, changed his political views, and even modified his family dynamics to fit her preferences. Is that right or wrong? I suppose it all depends on which side of this faith you are on—you see, there are indeed sides to this narrative. Interestingly, I also know others who have experienced a completely flipped story. In their cases, they were influenced by a committed Christ follower and, as a result, transformed into devoted Christians themselves.
Addiction can start from the influence of others. You take your very first drink or hit from a friend, and before you know it, you’re hooked, caught in a cycle that can be hard to break. We are all shaped by the people who enter our lives and by the environments we inhabit. I grew up in a very impoverished and high-crime area, where the shadows of prostitution, drugs, theft, and assaults were an everyday occurrence. Because of this, I was influenced both positively and negatively. On one hand, I desperately wanted to escape the environment that surrounded me, so I knew I had to make better choices for my future, or I was going to end up trapped in this place indefinitely. On the other hand, my upbringing filled me with a constant sense of skepticism, and I grew up questioning everyone’s motives. I have an extremely hard time trusting others, even a little bit. I witnessed people getting ripped off or assaulted by those they thought were in their corner, and I saw scams unfold and men mistreat women almost every single day.
We all influence others on some scale, whether we realize it or not. Our presence can dramatically change the mood in a room through our behavior and energy. Simply by sharing our opinions, we can change the perspectives and opinions of those around us. This holds true for everyone; we all have a responsibility towards others in our communities and beyond. Yes, we absolutely do! Those in the spotlight, such as celebrities, influential leaders, dedicated teachers, and the elders in our families, carry an even bigger responsibility resting on their shoulders. Many impressionable minds are closely observing their every move. How they choose to dress, how they interact with others, and what their personal beliefs are all play a significant role in shaping the views of those looking up to them. Although they may not have consciously signed up for this weighty responsibility, it is a prominent part of the position they find themselves in.
I know you may not see my point, and perhaps as usual, I might not have one to present. However, I encourage you to form your own analysis or opinion on the matter at hand. But at the very least, it’s important to recognize that you have the ability to influence those around you, and with that influence comes a responsibility to be good and do good in the world. Being negative and constantly complaining about life or the various challenges it throws our way doesn’t really solve any of the problems we face. In fact, getting angry over an inconsiderate driver on the road will only take more precious time away from you that could be spent focusing on the positive aspects of your day. You absolutely have the ability to make a strong and conscious effort in selecting the influences that surround you. Choose wisely, and remember that those choices can have a significant impact on your life and well-being.
The next time someone in your life takes on the challenge of going on a diet to lose weight or to gain muscle, or if someone is striving to overcome addiction, make sure to encourage and support them rather than tempting them toward failure. Your positive reinforcement can make a world of difference in their journey, helping them stay motivated and focused on their goals. Make sure to take the time to look at your life and truly appreciate the positive things that surround you, rather than focusing solely on the negative aspects. Be quick to get excited about the little joys and wonders life has to offer, and practice being slow to anger or complain about the things that may not go your way. After all, a positive outlook can truly change anyone’s day or even the toughest challenge they face! Just a little sprinkle of optimism can turn the tide and bring a brighter perspective to any situation.
CL
